Children who are over-parented suffer from over-compensation. When this occurs, they can become overly dependent on their parents. In addition, as children grow older, they become more dependent and take fewer risks than children who are not over-parented.
Therefore, over-parenting can cause many problems that children experience throughout their lives.
This article will examine why over-parenting occurs, how it affects children’s personal growth, and what problems it causes.
Why Does Over-Parenting Occur?
Photo by CDC on Unsplash.
There are several reasons for over-parenting occurrences. The most common cause is that parents want to give their children the best life possible. They want to ensure that their children have everything they need, want, and can do.
Another reason is that parents want to control their children’s lives and make sure that they follow specific rules. So they try to keep them safe and happy by taking on all the responsibilities in their lives.
The Psychological Effects of Over-Parenting
Many over-parenting adults feel they must control everything that happens in their child’s life. Unfortunately, this can make them feel as if they must do everything instead of letting the child make their own decisions.
Overly controlling parents can have high stress and anxiety levels because they feel like they are failing to be exemplary parents. This can lead to parents becoming frustrated with their children. They think the children are becoming spoiled or disobedient simply because they are not following their parent’s rules.
The psychological effects of parental control can also cause parents to feel guilty about the negative effects that they are having on their children.
Parents who feel guilty about their style of parenting will often try to take control of their child’s life to make up for the negative aspects of their parenting.
The Consequences of Over-Parenting
Too much parental involvement can lead to many problems during the development of children. For example, overly controlling parents may force their children into careers they do not want. They can also cause children to marry someone they do not love.
Overly controlling parents may also prevent their children from experiencing positive feelings and social interactions with other people. They fear that if the children have too much contact with others, it will damage the relationship between themselves and their children.
Children who are over-parented become less independent as they grow older.
This can lead to a decline in self-esteem for these children because it causes them to feel as if they are less important than others in society.
Children who are over-parented may also suffer from depression because of the adverse effects of parenting on their self-esteem.
Tips to Stop Over-Parenting
Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash.
Parents who are over-parenting should recognize the obstructive effects on their children and then change their parenting skills. Parents should also realize that they need to allow their children to make their own decisions to become more independent as they grow older.
Here are tips on how to stop over-parenting:
- Stop being overly controlling. Instead, give your child the freedom to make their own decisions and try to respect those decisions as long as they are healthy.
- Let your child decide what they want and don’t want to do.
- Respect your child’s preferences, and don’t push them into doing things they don’t want to do.
- Accept that children differ from adults, and don’t compare them to yourself. They’re growing up, not yet ready to get a job and earn their own money.
- Allow your child to make mistakes and be understanding when they do so. You can help them learn from their mistakes if you are honest with them about what happened. Let them know on their own.
- Don’t force your will on them, or they will develop an attitude of defiance and resistance. This can lead to lifelong feelings of resentment against you or other authority figures in their lives because of how you treated them when they were young.
- Don’t put a lot of pressure on your child about schoolwork or homework. Realize that you need to keep the expectations high for your child to succeed in school or in life. But, it’s important not to put so much pressure on your child that it damages their self-esteem and causes them to resent you.
- Teach your child that they can rely on you to help them in need, but don’t expect your child to depend on you for everything. Allow your child to make their own decisions and learn from their mistakes.
- Don’t expect your child to be perfect or overly responsible for everything. Give them the freedom to make mistakes without making them feel like they’re failures. The same goes for things that you make mistakes on or don’t do perfectly yourself (but at least acknowledge it).
Children who are over-parented may also suffer from mental illnesses such as depression, leading to many problems.
Parents who don’t want their children’s mental health to suffer should ensure that they stop over-parenting and let the children grow up with healthy self-esteem and independence.
Over-parenting can cause many problems that children experience throughout their lives. Therefore, it is vital for parents who are over-parenting their children to recognize these effects and then change their parenting skills. Hopefully, they can improve family relationships by doing so.
Our blog, The Mindful Parent, focuses on the relationship between parents and their children. We cover topics such as over-parenting, over-possessiveness, and over-protection of children. If you are interested in this topic, check out more articles at Mindful Parent.